Cero A Dos Again

A third straight 0-2 defeat for Newcastle. Not a great effort from the Union and they fell to Miami by the same score. Lots of fun watching the relegation race, especially now that Newcastle and Aston Villa aren't involved.

Narrowing the Gulf?

Wilson missed a big chance - Getty Images

Maybe but there is still a significant gap between Newcastle and the elite sides of the EPL.  The Magpies were creditable in their 0-2 loss to Man City.  They did come to play and did not fade meekly into the background.  There were long stretches when they actually had the run of play.  Still, it was another goalless outing.  Wilson had a big whiff on a volley; Almiron couldn't produce a cross or a shot.  Put money that E-sock will replace one of those two in the starting XI against Wolves this weekend.  At least we weren't expecting any points from this one.

Liverpool Learned How to Play - Uh Oh (apologies to Happy Gilmore)

In what is decidedly bad news for Man United, Tottenham, Newcastle and maybe Brighton, Fulham and Brentford, Liverpool looked to have found their mojo in a 7-0 trouncing of Man United.  This was a lively but scoreless match until Robertson and Gakpo hooked up for a goal just before halftime.  The tally, seen here, is a textbook pass into space for a diagonal run that included the finish it deserved.  From there, Liverpool were relentless.  Klopp took off two players on hat tricks (Gakpo and Nunez).  Everything they tried worked.  This was Man United's worse Premier League defeat.  

Don't Listen To Me

Hopefully you made your own viewing choices this weekend, as last week's post would have steered you in the wrong direction.  I believe we said something about all the other 10 am choices being more appealing than Arsenal - Bournemouth.  Of course, that one turned out to be the best of the weekend.  The Gunners were trailing 0-2 though 60+ minutes before they started a comeback.   One by Partey at 62 minutes and a second from White at 70 minutes put them back in the match but a game winner would not come.  Well, not until the last play of game, when Reiss Nelson fired in a rocket from just inside the box.  We make it this week's YouTubeableMoment, in part for the timing and the quality of the goal but also for how the stadium erupted.  Gave me goose bumps and I don't even like Arsenal.  Might need to remember that goal when May comes around.

And Wolves - Spurs was probably a better choice than either Aston Villa - Crystal Palace or Chelsea - Leeds.  We did note that Spurs are consistently inconsistent and they were again in a 0-1 loss to Wolves.  Chelsea's 1-0 win over Leeds, which I sped through on DVR, looked awfully boring; also, I wouldn't think a narrow win like that did much for Graham Potter's security.  Aston Villa's 1-0 win was the quintessential example of "fugly."  The only scoring was an own goal.  There were 31 fouls and seven yellow cards, including two for Doucoure'.  Villa couldn't score with the man advantage, though neither were they particularly pressed; Palace's xG was .25.  Three more points for the Villans and at 34 points, the rest of the season is about how far up the table they can go.

Heavily, Narrowly, Dramatically

During the Southampton - Leicester match, Peter Drury efficiently updated us on the earlier fates of Southampton's relegation rivals.  The "heavily" was West Ham's 0-4 defeat to Brighton, the "narrowly" was the aforementioned loss by Leeds to Chelsea and the "dramatically" was the previously discussed Bournemouth comeback loss at Arsenal.

Southampton ended up getting a narrow 1-0 win that at least took them out of the basement.  But an indication of how the Saints season has been going is that 1) the incredibly talented free kick specialist James Ward-Prowse somehow failed to convert a PK and 2) the goal scorer Carlos Alcarez  hurt himself on the celebratory slide after the goal.

When the weekend was done, there are nine sides with a measurable percentage chance of relegation.  Bournemouth are the new leader at 64, with Southampton (63) and Everton (58) in hot pursuit.  Nottingham Forest are uncomfortably close at 40.  The five "longshots" at this point are Leeds(28), West Ham (14), Wolves (14), Leicester (11) and Crystal Palace (8).  Palace are a late entry but they have not won a match in 2023 and  have five points and just four goals in those nine matches.  Yeah, that'll put you in the relegation race. 

New Old Issue for Newcastle Ownership

You may recall that during all the gnashing of teeth about the purchase of Newcastle United by the Public Investment Fund (PIF), the issue seemed to come down to one key point - that the EPL received "legally binding assurances that the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia will not control Newcastle United Football Club." Though many expressed skepticism that PIF and the Saudi government were actually separate, that argument carried the day.

Now comes a court dispute between LIV, which is financed by the PIF, and the PGA regarding professional golf.  In court documents related to the case, the PIF has said that it is part of a foreign government and that PIF is "sovereign instrumentality of the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia" and its governor (Yasir Al-Rumayyan) is a "sitting minister of the Saudi government."  Details can be had here.  Dennis is not a lawyer but his take was "seems kinda like an obvious problem."

If You Can't Say Anything Nice...

Get a British football commentator to find a diplomatic way to say it.  They were in good form this weekend, as evidenced by these examples:

"They will have wished the ball had fallen to someone else" rather than "His finishing skills are s**t."

" I think he said keep your thoughts to yourself" rather than "Shut the f**k up."

"He had a fair bit of net to aim at" rather than "He missed a wide open goal."

 "That shot was a bit speculative on his part" rather than "WTF was he thinking?"

If At First You Don't Succeed...

A slew of Dortmund's defenders are closer than 10 yards
before the kick was taken and one got to the rebound first

Hope that a defender encroached on the PK so you get a second try.  Chelsea, coming off the unimpressive win over Leeds on the weekend, had to face Borussia Dortmund in the second leg of their Champions League Round of 16 tie, down 0-1.  Rahim Sterling had a awful miss in the box but somehow recovered the ball and leveled the match late in the first half.  Early in the second half, Chelsea were awarded a PK.   Kai Havertz hit the post and the ball was then cleared by a Dortmund defender.  The good news for Chelsea was that the defender who cleared the ball had entered the penalty area before the kick was taken, which meant a second chance.  Not sure if there was a debate but Havertz took the second try and did not miss.  The Blues held on for a 2-1 win on aggregate and advance to the quarterfinals.

Tottenham were not so lucky.  Lifeless is probably too strong a word but they didn't impress in a 0-0 draw in London.  Romero's second yellow at 77 minutes didn't help either.  With the 0-1 loss on aggregate, they are out.  Notably, so too are PSG, who lost 0-3 to Bayern.

A Rotten Apple

I will admit I went into the Union telecast on Apple's MLS Season Pass with a negative attitude towards this subscription service.  Even so, I think it's earned an F.  And to be clear, it's not about the money.  For one thing, as a Union season ticket holder, we get a free subscription.  But more than that, this is not unlike many other soccer leagues.  And, maybe the new revenue will improve the quality of the league. 

No, my objections are based on other issues.  For one, we no longer have a "home team" broadcasting crew.  This is particularly annoying since, in JP Dellacamera and Danny Higginbotham, I thought we had a superb combination.  But even if the Apple team is decent (Saturday's team were mediocre at best), we still lose out on both the team knowledge and the comforting familiarity of having "our guys" covering the match.

Second, BFS Artistic Director Laura O, who watched the match with me, commented that the Apple graphics were s**t.  She noted how the fonts were weak and thin, color backgrounds didn't make sense and basically everything was hard to read.  BTW, she was also unimpressed with the announcers and asked "where are our guys?"

Um, big spoiler alert

But the most unforgiveable sin, the one which ensures a failing grade, is that if you want to watch a replay as opposed to live, the final score is posted right there on the thumbnail picture that you click on to get to the match.  WTF?  Wait, it gets better.  This is only a problem if you're not using an Apple device.  Confirmation once again that they are indeed evil.  If you ever see me with an Apple phone, call the police because it means I have been kidnapped.  

It Was Apple's Fault

Not really but the Union's performance Saturday night against Miami in the 0-2 loss was as frustrating as the Apple broadcast.  The stats say the U were the better side but the Herons had two great finishes, including this volley from Robert Taylor shortly after he entered the match; sometimes all you can do is tip your cap.  Note that there were 31 fouls (17 by the Union) and four yellows (three for the Union) that undoubtedly accounted for the frustrating viewing.  

Is That on the Bingo Card?

Final stats: three touches and a sending off

Not to take anything away from how the Union played Alianza to a 0-0 draw in El Salvador on Tuesday night in the first leg of their CONCACAF Champions League tie, but my two takeaways were the quality of the pitch (almost as bad as Chestnut Hill's Water Tower Rec Center field) and the dog coming on to said pitch.  Video can be had here.  Stu Holden's commentary is almost as good as the video - was a dog running on the field on your Concacaf Champions League bingo card?

Seriously, this was a decent effort from an almost fully rotated squad.  They were clearly the better side for the first 20 minutes; Donovan missed a great header opportunity, possibly because of the mask he was wearing to protect his broken nose.  The rest of the match felt more 50/50 so the 0-0 result seems about right. They are well-positioned for the return leg back at Subaru Park on Tuesday night.

Empathy for the Devil (apologies to the Rolling Stones)

There's always something unintentionally humorous in the referee recertification materials.  This year's entry:

Showing empathy, and a red card, to Romero

Ironically, we saw this exact situation late in the Tottenham - Milan Champions League match when Romero injured himself committing a reckless challenge.  Referee Clement Turpin waited to make sure that Romero was okay - though not on his feet yet - to show the second yellow and the requisite red card; he looks like he's trying to be empathetic.

BTW, I got 97 out of 100 on the recertification test and my 2023 badge is on its way.

Spring Forward

This match week's fixtures are on the underwhelming side.  Per 538, the most competitive match is - wait, this can't be right - Leicester vs Chelsea.  The Blues are only slight favorites here, which I guess makes sense given their season to date.

You can get an early start Saturday with Bournemouth - Liverpool at 7:30 (USA); no reason to get excited about that one given Liverpool's recent form but I said the same thing last week about Arsenal -Bournemouth so take it with a grain of salt.  For the 10 am choices, I was initially thinking Leicester - Chelsea for the reason noted above.  Except Everton - Brentford could be a close one too and watching Everton's fight against relegation has been interesting to follow.  Leeds - Brighton and Spurs - Nottingham Forest are the other options.  Tottenham are favored but have they fallen into a funk?  Leeds - Brighton could be some good up and down action.  The 12:30 feature match (on USA, not NBC who are covering the Players Championship Golf Tournament) is Crystal Palace - Man City.  Hmm, golf might be the choice there.

Sunday is crowded with three matches at 10 am (we move to DST while Britain holds on for another two weeks).  The most interesting of the lot is West Ham - Aston Villa, which is fortunate because that's the one we'd be watching anyway.  Schedule makers agree as well given that's the one USA will broadcast.  After last week's drubbing by Brighton, Moyes' position quite tenuous.  Your back-up choices are Fulham - Arsenal or Man United - Southampton.  Saving the "best" for last, at 12:30 Newcastle will host Wolves.  Given the Magpies have the fewest goals allowed (17) while Wolves have the fewest scored (19) and that Newcastle can't seem to find the net right now, one might expect a low-scoring affair.  An elite side would be thinking this is three points; somehow a draw feels in the offing due to the lack of goals.

Two mid-week matches on Wednesday with Brighton hosting Crystal Palace and Brentford traveling to Southampton.

The Chicago Fire come to Subaru Park to face the Union on Saturday night at 7:30 pm.  The good news is the rain is supposed to have stopped and the temperature won't have fallen below 40 degrees yet.  Philly haven't lost at home in a long time.

Europe action continues mid-week.  Man City have the home leg of their tie with RB Leipzig on Tuesday; that one is level at 1-1.  On Wednesday Liverpool travel to face Real Madrid, down 2-5 after the first leg; wouldn't have given that one much thought except for the seven goals they got against Man United.  Nah, still probably not going to happen.  On Thursday, both Man United (up 4-1 on Real Betis) and Arsenal (2-2 with Sporting) have the second legs of their Round of 16 ties in Europa League.

And don't forget the second leg of the Union match up with Alianza.  They're at Subaru Park Tuesday at 8 pm.  Probably will see 1) a better pitch and 2) no dogs on the field.  

Geez, there's a lot going on.