Thanks For Nuthin'

With the Magpies facing Chelsea at Stamford Bridge, we turned our eyes to others for help in the relegation fight.  That worked out great.  Man United only managed a draw with West Brom and Aston Villa did the same with Brighton.  Everton were the worst the offenders, with an 0-2 loss to Fulham.  At least West Ham managed to pin back Sheffield United 3-0.   When the final whistle blew on Chelsea's 2-0 win over Newcastle on Monday, Fulham sat just seven behind the Magpies, with a game in hand. The 1-1 midweek draw with Burnley brought them even closer.  At 538, they have Newcastle with a 30% chance of relegation, Fulham 56%.  We have been here before.

None of the weekend's games - or the two midweek contests for that matter - were all that interesting.  So we will turn our attention to things you may have missed.

Keeper Assist - Because Man City Needs More Scoring Punch

Ederson wanted a goal to go with his assist
 but Silva tells him Rodri will be taking the PK

Man City turned to an unlikely source for an assist in their 3-0 win over Tottenham.  The score was already 2-0 when keeper Ederson launched a long pass that found the foot of Ilkay Gundogan, who did some nice work to get his second of the game.  We'll make the pass this week's  should have been YouTubeableMoment.  Ederson was probably still a little miffed that he didn't get to take the PK in the first half.  Earlier in the week Pep had suggested he might make Ederson the PK taker, as that aspect might be the weakest part of City's game right now.  Apparently he hadn't pulled the trigger on that idea and teammates had to gently dissuade Ederson from taking the ball.  

With a midweek win over Everton, City have won 12 straight league matches and are undefeated in 16.  Add eight more wins or draws from League Cup, FA Cup and Champions League and they have 17 straight wins and are undefeated in 24, going 21-3-0.  Ten points up with 12 to play isn't a lock but they look pretty solid.  Good thing they are just getting DeBruyne back from injury.  Look at the bench for Wednesday's match - Steffen, Stones, Zinchenko, Mendy, Garcia, DeBruyne, Fernandinho, Aguero, and Torres.  That's probably a mid-table team or better right there.  Didn't they just dodge a two-year ban for violating Financial Fair Play provisions?

Firmino Assist - Not That It Mattered

Liverpool's fall continued with a 3-1 loss at Leicester.  The Reds did have the lead for a little while courtesy of a Salah goal off an otherworldly assist from Firmino.  The footwork was exquisite, seen here in this week's YouTubeableMoment.  Unfortunately for them, Leicester responded with three of their own in less than 10 minutes.  I guess last week they only fell from the tower; this week they landed hard.  

Well Now We Have A Name For It

Well, at least one thing useful came out of the Brighton - Aston Villa 0-0 draw.  You know when a defender lies down behind the wall on a free kick so that the players in the wall can jump and not worry if the shooter goes low?  Ian Darke has a name for it that is as incomparably British as it is descriptive - the draft excluder.  It's the thing you put at the bottom of a door to keep the cold wind out.   Brilliant.

Top - Draft Excluder $25.99 from Etsy
Bottom - Pablo Fornals £24 m from West Ham

Conversation That Could Have Taken Place But Didn't

Dennis: Fulham just missed a headed goal?

Steve: No, I said Tete almost scored

Conversation That Could Have Taken Place and Did

Brenna: It's been all Brighton so far

Dennis: Can't be.  He doesn't play for Villa anymore

A Press Conference Can Be Informative

Dennis sends along this video of Sean Dyche offering valuable insights.  For example, we get another Britishism; lookey-likey.  Apparently this is how they say "lookalike" in England.  More importantly, Dyche basically points out that asking whether other EPL managers play the game lookie-likey will be more revelatory than inquiring about tactics:

Be much more fun than asking me about whether we're going to play a 4-4-2 and then go "Yeah he is.  Sean Dyche is going to play a 4-4-2."

This will be Dennis's new retort when someone says something obvious to him.  "Yeah, and Sean Dyche is gonna play a 4-4-2."  No one will know what he means but it will make him feel good.

Not Your Father's Barcelona

BFS Travel Agent Jeff K offers this from NYT Rory Smith on the financial issues at Barcelona that are starting to affect the product on the pitch.  We saw an good example of the problems when a Neymar-less PSG took Barca apart at Camp Nou 1-4 in the first leg of a Champions League Round of 16 match.  Of course it's not over until the second leg, but a three goal lead and four away goals make PSG an odds-on favorite to advance.

Other Random Thoughts

Keeper Mat Ryan went on loan from Brighton to Arsenal but at the time only moved up four places in the table.  The Gunners did look better though in a 4-2 win over Leeds.

Dennis notes that last year's 16th and 17th place teams (West Ham and Aston Villa) are currently sitting 5th and 8th.  If they can do it, why can't Newcastle?

We have previously noted that an unwatched dvr of an EPL game is the lowest ranking you can give of a match's worth.  We may have found the second lowest - not treadmill worthy.  As in, it's not enough to keep your interest while you're on your treadmill or exercise bike.

Forecast Calls for Pain (apologies to Robert Cray)

This week the Magpies travel to Old Trafford to face Man United; 538 has that one at 80/6/14 so anything less than an 0-3 loss is probably a moral victory.  That's Sunday at 2 pm on Peacock.  For some reason, all the Sunday matches are Peacock this week.

Three important matches for Champions League contenders.  Aston Villa have a real test of their new credentials with a home match against Leicester Sunday at 9 am.  We will find out if the Villans have a real shot at qualifying for Champions League.  Dennis doesn't think they do.  He is also suffering from a severe case of Elophobia (fear of qualifying for Europa League) - "we don't say the E word in this house."  Then there's the Merseyside Derby at Enfield Saturday (feature match on NBC at 12:30).  Neither come into the match in good form.  Liverpool have lost three straight (though they did get a midweek 2-0 win over RB Leipzig in CL action) while Everton have dropped two in a row.  And third, we have West Ham - Tottenham at 7 am Sunday; Spurs chances likely depend on getting all three points here but that will not be easy given their recent form.

Man City have what used to be a tough road test against Arsenal (Sunday at 11:30) but off of recent form they are big favorites.  Chelsea are also favorites in their match at Southampton (7:30 Saturday on NBCSN).  

Three notable matches down at the bottom.  Newcastle fans will be all over the Fulham - Sheffield United contest at 3 pm on Saturday (Peacock); boy do we need Sheffield to come up big here.  There's also Burnley - West Brom at 10 am Saturday (NBCSN); the Clarets are close to safety at this point while this is a match that the Baggies need if they are to have any hope of escaping.  Brighton play Crystal Palace on Monday (3 pm on NBCSN); both are almost home and a win for one of them here probably seals the deal.  

One midweek EPL fixture in Leeds vs Southampton (Tuesday at 1 pm on NBCSN).  The Saints have quietly racked up six straight EPL losses but are likely safe anyway while Leeds have been inconsistent but safe as well. 

Also, more Champions League and Europa action midweek so plenty to take in while you multitask.

Almost forgot - you can get an early start to the weekend with Wolves - Leeds on Friday at 3 pm on Peacock.  These are two sides in the EPL nether region between relegation and contending for CL/EL spots but both play some attractive football so worth checking out.  Besides, what else on you going to do on a winter Friday afternoon?  Beats shoveling snow.